When saving up is a bad idea . . .
I’d been meaning to buy a backup drive for a long time, but it hadn’t made it to the top of the spending priority list. There were other things, like doctor bills and gas and, you know, savings and stuff, and I told myself that instead of taking the money out of the savings account, I’d do it “next time there’s money in the budget.”
And then my hard drive crashed and the computer technicians have declared the data permanently gone and I lost thirty scrapbook pages and all the materials I used to make them, which means that I can’t go back and remake them. They’re just . . . gone. And of course I didn’t print them because prints cost 2.99 each and, well, you get the idea.
I’m acting casual about it now, but only because I just spent half an hour crying and wondering if I was going to throw up.
I’m so mad at myself for not backing up those gorgeous, sacred pages. So mad at myself. So so so so so so mad! And some of them were really, really cute, too.
I can’t think about it anymore. I just can’t. I’m going to have to “clean slate” it, which is where I make a mental cut that separates the past and all its related baggage completely and just focuses on where I am in the present. When I think about everything I lost–the hundreds of hours, the money, the beautiful pages– it makes me never want to scrap again. I’m going to pretend that I just woke up this morning and said, “You know, I’ve never made any digital scrapbook pages before, but I have all this mysterious, spontaneous knowledge about where to download free materials and how to do lots of cool techniques, so I think I’ll give it a shot.”
Wow. Just typing that made me feel better. Now if I can just get my appetite back before dinner.
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